Software Malfunction - Short Story

Desk waited, but not patiently. The screen displayed the 'connecting' image, a picture of a tranquil mountainside with a mirror-like lake reflecting snowy peaks and emerald pines. It did nothing to calm him.

“Come on, come on,” he growled.

The image stubbornly remained present, the spinning arrow icon informing him to wait his turn. Eventually the connection was established, the image transforming into the view of a customer service cubicle, staffed by the obligatory pretty blonde, dressed in casual clothes, her t-shirt emblazoned with the Coresoft logo. The girl smiled sweetly at Desk, ignoring his obvious frustration.

“Hi, welcome to Coresoft customer service, my name's Sandy. Can I take your customer reference number?” she reeled off in an enthusiastic tone.

“3526060,” Desk said through gritted teeth. He knew the number off by heart; he'd had to relay it to four different people already.

“Thank you very much,” sang the blonde girl, her Handroid limb replacements plugging into her computer console, the soft outer shell breaking open, miniscule tendrils leaping out of her fingers, connecting with computer. “What seems to be the problem Mister Tenth?”

At last, Desk thought.

“My Handroids have broken and I need an emergency repair.”

“Could you detail the nature of the accident to me?”

“It wasn't an accident, it was a product malfunction,” Desk snapped.

“Mister Tenth, I must remind you that I can block you from contacting Coresoft customer service if you are in any way insulting or aggressive,” retorted the girl patronisingly.

“OK, OK. I'm sorry,” said Desk with frustration.

“That's fine Mister Tenth,” replied the girl with saccharine sweetness. “So, what happened to your Handroids?”

“I was working online and a cancer cell infiltrated my computer. I tried to stop it but the cell had already infected most of my system.”

“I'm afraid Coresoft can't refund or repair any damage caused by a third-party – ”

“No, that's not the problem,” interrupted Desk. “When I realised the system was overrun I tried to disconnect before the cancer cell made its way into my Handroids, but they wouldn't disconnect. I literally had to rip myself away.” He raises his arms into view, showing the girl the buzzing stumps where his cyborg-hands had once been. The girl's face turned an ugly pale shade.

“Mister Tenth, are you sure you're alright?'

“Yeah, I turned the pain receptors off before I did it,” Desk said impatiently. “How quickly can you send someone with a new pair?”

The girl regained her composure. She studied her computer screen. Desk waited, tapping one of his stumps on the surface of his workstation.

“I'm sorry but because the problem was caused by a software malfunction, your warranty doesn't cover a free replacement.”

“Excuse me?”

“The disconnection program that syncs the Handroids is out-sourced from Delitech. The warranty you took out only covers issues pertaining to Coresoft products. I can reconnect you to Delitech customer service if you want, but to be honest, I don't think they will – ”

“You have got to be joking,” Desk said incredulously.

“No Mister Tenth,” the girl replied seriously. “My contract strictly states that I am not allowed to joke.”

“I was never made aware that I wouldn't be covered in this type of situation,” shouted Desk.

“Did you sign the terms and conditions?” asked the girl.

“Well yes, but – ”

“Did you read them?”

“I probably skimmed over them, but – ”

“I'm sorry Mister Tenth but section three point two, paragraph six of the silver class warranty terms and conditions clearly states – ”

“Alright, alright,” spat Desk.

“Mister Tenth, I don't want to block you but if you continue to behave in this manner, I'll have no choice.”

“OK. I apologise,” replied Desk in defeat.

“Thank you. Would you like me to put you through to your local store so you can purchase a replacement?”

Desk shrugged.

“Doesn't look like I have much of a choice,” he said, looking gloomily down at his broken stumps. “Can't do much without any hands, can I?”

“I'll just reconnect you Mister Tenth,” smiled the girl. The mountainside reappeared on the screen and Desk prepared himself for another long wait.

Writer's block, RPG fun, and the first definitive test of whether a person is good or evil!

You may have noticed that after devoting an entire post to the topic of my current writing project, 'This Dark World', I haven't mentioned my novel idea for a while. The reason for this is that I am suffering the dreaded writer's block. Everytime I try to sit down and devote some time to my creative endevour I seem to hit a mental brick wall. All inspiration and motivation drains out of my mind, leaving me an ineffective husk of a man. That might be a slight exaggeration, but you get the picture.

However, I think I've discovered the root of my writing issues. After reworking the fantasy concept of my story, I went through my draft and cut out everything that definitely wasn't useful anymore, leaving the parts that could possibly be cannibalised into the new form of my story. I don't think I went far enough in my purging actions. I'm getting caught up in reworking my old draft and combining it with my latest work, and making no progress. I am therefore turning a new page and starting over. I'm keeping my first six chapters because these aren't causing me any problems, but the rest are gone.I have kept hold of all my old drafts, but only as a reference of my progress. I'll let you know how my fresh start goes, but I think it's safe to assume I won't be finished by Christmas!

As a result of my writer's block, I've been doing a fair bit of gaming recently; role-playing games in particular have been my source of solace. I finally completed the main story quest of Fallout 3 the other day, after getting bored with the myriad side missions. There were some really interesting twists and turns in the narrative, getting you caught up in some awesome battles and interesting puzzles before the end. I'm playing through the Operation: Anchorage DLC now, which focuses on the FPS aspects of the game, offering the player a high-paced, guns-blazing version of the Fallout 3's action.

I also, to my shame, recently downloaded a ten-day trial of World of Warcraft. In my defence, I wanted to give the game an objective look, rather than dismissing it out of hand, and I have to admit; it's actually quite fun. I found it very easy to pick up as a beginner, although the demo did limit me to the basic quests, which all boil down to the same process - run to an area, kill a certain amount of enemies and loot their corpses, then return to the quest-giver. However, the landscape of the game is pretty in a cartoonish way, but also very involving and deep, allowing you to get lost in the world. The character customisation options are also extensive, allowing players to craft an unique avatar with specific skills and traits. It's fun to be playing alongside other human players as well, although I can see how the game can be a time-drain if you commit to questing with other people. I don't think I can justify getting into a game that requires me to pay subscription fees, and so although I have enjoyed my brief experience of World of Warcraft, it will remain a game that I don't regularly play.

Finally, here is a video that will separate those whose souls are filled with darkness from those who cling to purity and virtue. It shows two kittens who have 'fainting goat syndrome', meaning that they go rigid if they hear a loud noise or are shocked. Watch the clip; if you laugh, you are evil. If you cry, you are good. It's as simple as that. Enjoy!

Another Square-Enix disappointment...

I was actually quite excited about the release of this game, but it seems that I got my hopes up for nothing. Seriously, the Final Fantasy series is turning into the debacle that Star Wars has become. I guess I'll just have to accept that they'll never achieve the greatness of VII again.

Top tips for video game widows

As a fairly avid gamer (I wouldn't call myself 'hardcore', but that's another debate entirely), I have witnessed the annoyance and anguish that my video game interest can generate in my other half. I know it can be hard for my wife to comprehend when I ask her to wait until this essential boss-battle is over before she can receive any hugs and kisses. I have therefore decided to compile some key hints and tips for the 'wives and girlfriends' of video game fanatics, so that the fairer sex can learn to deal with their partner's obsession a little more effectively.

DISCLAIMER: I completely and totally accept that gaming is not a strictly masculine activity. Maybe you're a guy reading this who has a gamer girlfriend, and you're the one in need of some coping mechanisms. If so, MAN UP! However, whilst I don't wish to be sexist, my experience has been that it is more often the woman moaning at the man to turn the flipping console off and pay them some attention.

1. Know how his game 'saves'

A common excuse for a guy to continue gaming after you've asked him to stop is that he just needs to save the game and then he'll be done. Find out how the save function on his current game of choice works. Can he save at any moment or does he need to reach a save point? If the former is the truth, then what your partner might mean is, 'I could save now, but I want to make sure I've equipped all my best items and organised my inventory before I do'. Ask him to clarify this with you, so as to receive a more accurate finishing time. If he needs to reach a certain point to save his progress, ask for regular updates as to the location of this point in the game. You don't want to miss a prime opportunity to drag his attention away. Finally, be aware of whether or not a game as an 'auto-saving' function. If it does, then your partner has no excuse in regards to ending his gaming abruptly, because little or no progress will be lost.

2. Beware of multiplayer, online and off

Multiplayer gaming can be the biggest time-sink for your gamer-man, and can be very detrimental to chances of you and him spending any 'quality' time together. You have to bear in mind that in most cases, once an online multiplayer game has begun it cannot be be paused or ended prematurely without the player incurring losses or being ejected from the game. You may have to wait patiently for a match to finish, but be prepared to jump into action as soon as it does. Otherwise he may start another game, thus prolonging your wait for affection and attention. Offline multiplayer is also a danger for which you should be ready. If your boyfriend/husband is surrounded by his friends, he is much less likely to heed to your demands for an activity that you can also enjoy, valuing his couple of hours of FIFA 11 as a worthy prize for enduring the wrath you plan to pour upon him as soon as his mates are out of the door. However, there is an upside to offline multiplayer - the opportunity to create a bartering system. If you allow him an evening of Halo death-matches one weekend, then you can trade this in for an evening of manicures and Sex and the City another weekend. If he protests, then entice him with the prospect of allowing more gaming in the future, but only if the barter system is fair and its laws are upheld by both parties.

3. The pros and cons of 'seemingly endless' games

Some might say that it is best for your man to be playing short games that he will complete within a week or so, as this provides less chance for serious obsession to set in. I disagree with this thinking, as short games mean more money spent on new products, and the constant use of the excuse, 'but I've only just bought it, I've hardly played it yet'. However, there are negative aspects to having games that either take a long time to complete or can continue infinitely. You should be very concerned if your partner is a fan of role-playing games, as these titles can have an all-consuming effect. If you hear the names, 'Final Fantasy, World of Warcraft or Fallout', alarm bells should start to ring, as these games will become your man's new adulterous lover if you aren't careful. However, there are positives to lengthy games. You can always use an uncompleted game as a reason for why a new game shouldn't be purchased. A key phrase to remember in this situation is, 'well if [insert game title] is too hard for you to complete, I guess you should buy an easier one'. Not many gamers will be able to shrug off this barbed comment.

4. Encourage him to play what is most enjoyable for you

Unless you are some kind of tyrant hag who has her partner firmly wedged under her thumb (if you are... please don't kill me), there will be times when you have to relent and allow your man some gaming time. However, this doesn't have to be a completely arduous process. Try to find out which of your partner's games are most enjoyable to watch him play. A good tip is to stay well clear of Football Manager, which is about as fun as watching someone make a spreadsheet on Excel. Cinematic games with a good story-line and high quality voice acting are ones to search for, which will hopefully alleviate your boredom a little bit. Some examples that have worked well in my experience are Uncharted 2 on the Playstation 3, and also Resident Evil 4 on the Wii. These games are exciting to watch, and will provide you with a marginally better backseat experience during your boyfriend/husband's gaming time.

Hopefully these tips will aid you in making life bearable with your video game-obsessed partner. Let me know if you have any tips of your own, or what your experiences are of putting these pieces of advice into action.

Assimilated

"Seriously guys, you've gotta sign up,” Will enthused. The young dark-haired student sat with his two companions in the university coffee shop, other groups sitting at the surrounding tables, the warm cosy room filled with conversation and laughter.

“I dunno,” remarked Emma, absentmindedly playing with her long blonde hair. “I've already got profiles on three or four sites and I used them all for about a month before getting bored of it.”

“Absolute.Network is different,” replied Will, sipping his coffee. “You don't have to do anything accept create a profile. The programme assimilates all your information for you.”

“How does that work?” questioned Henry, adjusting his glasses.

“Well it uses your web cam to get your picture – ”

“That's fairly obvious,” interrupted Emma, making Henry chuckle.

“ – but it also scans your surroundings and gathers the information needed to fill out your profile,” Will continued, ignoring her joke. “For example, I was doing some reading for my course last night, and when I checked my profile the programme had added my degree course to my personal info and had made a post about the exact book I was reading.”

Henry frowned.

“That sounds a bit invasive.”

“No, it's cool. There's loads of stuff in the regulations and rules that stops anyone from stealing your identity.”

“Yeah, if you trust that stuff,” retorted his friend.

“You're just too paranoid, Mister 'I change my email account every month',” said Will playfully, flicking a biscuit crumb at Henry, who dramatically pretended to be shot as it hit him, the trio laughing.

“Maybe I'll give it a try,” said Emma thoughtfully.

“Well, don't say I didn't warn you,” Henry said aloofly. “These things will take over your life.”

Entering his bedroom, Will took off his backpack and tossed it onto his unmade bed, sitting down at his desk with a sigh of relief. It felt good to get home. Surprising how three hours of lectures can really take it out of you. Almost like a really day's work. He turned on the monitor of his computer, the screen flickering into life. His Absolute.Network profile was gradually filling up with information, the 'hobbies and interests' area brimming with all the films, books and music he liked. Will smiled. So much easier than doing it all himself.

As he glanced at himself in the mirror something caught his eye. He stared at the reflective surface, confused. He was missing a freckle. He touched his face, his fingers passing over the place where the brown dot once was. Well, where he assumed it once was. Had it always been there? He turned back to the computer, scrutinising the image of his face on his profile page. There it was, just below his left eye. Maybe it was just a bit of dirt or a pimple, he thought, but in the back of his mind he knew it had been there for as long as he could remember.

A knock at the door startled him.

“Hey Will, you there?”

“Yeah, come in.”

The tousled curly-haired head of his house-mate Alex poked around the door.

“We're going out for a curry, you wanna come?”

“Um...yeah, alright,” replied Will, grabbing his jacket and following Alex out of the room, the missing freckle pushed to the dusty recesses of his mind.

Will climbed sluggishly back into bed, pulling the covers tightly around him. He felt terrible, completely drained. His house-mates had all made remarks about his colourless complexion when he had ventured downstairs for a slice of toast, urging him with concern to visit the doctor. He waved their anxiety away, asserting that he'd be fine in a day or two. It had already been three days since the illness had started however, and he couldn't even fool himself into thinking that he felt any better. He sank in and out of sleep, all the while his computer humming away in the background, a soothing electronic buzz.

He awoke, his bedroom shrouded in darkness, a shaft of streetlight dissecting the black space from between the parted curtains. An uncomfortable itching sensation covered his entire body, running from his head to his toes, like a thousand ants prickling his flesh. In the dimness he forced himself into a sitting position. He felt so weak. So tired. His head ached, his eyes dry and irritated. He scratched at his arms, the itch burning his skin. Something wasn't right. His skin felt...different, taut and cold. He laboriously swung his legs out of the bed and stood up, inspecting his body in the mirror.

The breath left his body as he caught sight of himself. His skin was completely featureless. No hair, no freckles, not a wrinkle or crease in sight, his body like a grotesque porcelain doll. A cry of fear escaped him as he saw his face. It looked like it had been sanded down to an almost faultless sphere, his nose reduced to a small lump, his mouth a smooth line, his eyes sinking into their sockets. His breath was shallow and fast, as if his lungs were being slowly crushed within him.

Then he saw the computer screen. Glowing in the black, it displayed his Absolute.Network profile picture. Not just a good match or a high-resolution digital copy, the image was perfect. His hair, his face, his imperfections and freckles; everything that was missing from his current mutated form. It was him.

Panic rushing over him, he stumbled towards the computer. He had to shut it down. He fell to his knees, his strength waning, head swimming, vision blurring. He reached out his hand, inching closer and closer, his finger brushing against the power button. Darkness enveloped him, wrapping him in unconsciousness. His body fell limply to the ground, motionless on the carpeted floor.

Emma and Henry sat in the coffee shop, mugs in front of them, a third mug in front of the empty place at the circular table. Henry checked his watch.

“He's never this late,” he remarked.

“You'd think he'd have told us if he wasn't coming,” Emma said, taking out her phone. She placed it against her ear, listening for a few seconds, then removing it. “No answer. I'll see if he's sent me anything on my profile.” She tapped the screen of her touch-phone, cycling through the menus and gadgets. “Nothing. I'll send him a message, he's always online.”

The End

Stop shooting me, please!

I've started playing Quake Live recently, which has been a mixed experience. While the game itself is awesome for a free-downloadable-online-multiplayer-FPS (what a mouthful!), I have come to the conclusion that I am definitely not awesome at playing it. Having played Doom, Quake and Quake II on the PC, I'm not completely unfamiliar with using keyboard controls, but I'm having some trouble adjusting, especially when trying to use a mouse pad instead of an actual mouse to aim. But only a bad sportsman blames his tools. I guess it will just take some practice. One day I'll reach the heights of second-to-last place!

One of my uni mates who graduated in the summer is being productive with the abundant free-time that unemployment provides and has written and published some game reviews on TheGamersHub. Have a look, see what you think.

Tom's review of Mass Effect - PC

Tom's review of Fallout 3: GOTY edition - Xbox 360

Tom's review of Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War II - PC

Tom's review of Dragon Age: Origins - Xbox 360

I'm lovin' it

I discovered this morning that if I turn around and face the door of my bathroom whilst I'm in the shower, I can see myself reflected in the mirror. It was rather unnerving, mainly because I decided to put my contact lenses in before I showered, so when I turned around I was presented with my long-lost twin, lathering up in high-def. Quite a disturbing image I assure you.

Anyway, getting back to the subject at hand, I'm loving Spotify at the moment! For anyone who hasn't heard of Spotify, it's a piece of downloadable software that gives you access to an online library of music for free. Sounds too good to be true right? Well, there are a few catches. To listen for free you, you have to put up with adverts that pop up in between every few songs, which cannot be skipped and pause if you turn the volume down. Sneaky! You can pay monthly for premium usage without adverts, or buy a daily pass for 99p to avoid the ads for 24 hours. The other catch is that due to it's rising popularity, Spotify is only available for free if you receive an invite, which you can apply for on their homepage. So unless you happened to sign up when it was fairly unknown, you've gotta wait indefinitely for an invite.

Apart from these negative aspects, caused by the need to squeeze the maximum amount of money out of the user, it's a pretty cool bit of software. There's a fairly wide variety of music in the library, which covers a lot of different genres and styles. Although it isn't exhaustive, I was quite surprised by the stuff I found on there. I've been using Spotify to listen to some cool music, such as the chilled-out alternative styles of Team Sleep, the side-project fronted by Chino Moreno of Deftones. On a similar vein, I discovered a band called Strata, who are a cross between The Mars Volta, Tool and Deftones. Very atmospheric and powerful. Sadly they've split up, which is annoying cos I've just got into them!

In other news, I've completely changed my writing project idea for university course. I was going to write the first 10,000 words of a sci-fi novel, but I was getting nowhere with it. I had a plot sorted out, which could extend into a series, but the setting and the characters just weren't coming to me. Every idea I thought of just seemed derivative and dull. So after a flash of inspiration I decided to start over with a new idea; I'm going to write a collection of short stories and micro-fictions (REALLY short stories!) with a sci-fi theme, inspired by quotes from my favourite films, fiction and music. Gotta pitch the idea to my tutor next Tuesday, let's hope it goes well!

The Big Decision

With the release date for Final Fantasy XIII announced to be spring 2010, a fork in the road is rapidly approaching for me. At last, a choice has to be made as to which of the next-gen consoles will win me over? I asked the advice of my friends and acquaintances (via Facebook), and I've started to narrow things down between purchasing either a Playstation 3 or an Xbox 360.

I'm told the PS3 is more powerful than the 360, which makes sense as the PS3 came out after the 360, but I haven't really been able to tell the difference in terms of graphics or performance. The PS3 has a Blu-ray DVD player built in, which is a plus as buying the console is the cheapest way to purchase one. There are rumours that an external Blu-ray player may be released for the 360, similar to its now obsolete HD/DVD player, but I would have to pay extra for that.

In terms of games the 360 is the winner at this moment in time. There are a lot more exclusive games out for it that I would definitely play, such as Gears of War 2 and Halo 3. MGS4 is probably the only exclusive for the PS3 that I would really be interested in, possibly Little Big Planet as well. However there are a few games available for both platforms that I would definitely buy, such as Fallout 3 and Oblivion. So that slightly levels the playing field.

Longevity is a very important factor in my selection. I'm still playing my Playstation 2 and that console has been out for years. In fact I'm still playing some of my PS1 games on it. So I want to know that the console I buy next will give me a few years before it becomes obsolete. The 360 is coming to the end of its life expectancy, and it would seem the PS3 will last longer. However, the cynic in me thinks that as soon as a new Microsoft console is released Sony will drop the PS3 and focus on its next project. But then again the PS1 and 2 have hung on for quite a while, so maybe I should trust Sony on this one.

The internet capabilities battle is easily won by the PS3. If I have to choose between free online play and paying around £50 for a years usage, the choice is a pretty simple one.

In terms of looks the PS3 and the 360 are both able as ugly as each other. When it comes down to it I'm going to end up using either console as a coffee table, regardless of how 'slimline' the new PS3 is supposed to be. Both the consoles controllers are equally aesthetically and ergonomically pleasing my opinion, so no clear victor there either.

So there you have it. I'm probably leaning slightly more towards the PS3, because it might last longer and has the built-in Blu-ray player. However the Xbox 360 has a lot more games out for it, and is slightly cheaper. I've got a few months to decide, we'll have to see if the situation changes by the spring!

Guess who's back?

It's taken a while, but I'm finally back online! I moved into my uni house at the end of September and we've got our internet/tv/phone package from Virgin Media sorted out at last. I thought we'd be stuck in the dark ages till next year, but after a trip to B&Q by my housemates, we managed to jury-rig the tv box thingie to work. The only downside at the moment is that we have a 20 metre cable snaking dangerously through our house, which seems to be sentiently trying to trip everyone over. And we don't have a phone yet.

My registration all went smoothly, despite my fears that the student loan fiasco would rear its ugly head again. My units are, for the most part, very interesting, in particular my dissertation unit and writing project. I'm writing a 90 minute scifi/noir screenplay for the former, and starting a fantasy/scifi novel for the latter. Essentially I have roughly 30,000 words to write whatever I want! Slightly daunting but I know I'll enjoy it.

Best get on, I'm popping home this weekend to work, so I need to pack and do a few other things. Over and out!

I'm listening to The Mars Volta for the first time in ages...

... which has nothing to do with this post really. Just checking in. Apologies for the inconsistancy in my posts recently, I doubt anyone noticed but i try to post the new sections of my stories every four days. My tendency for perfectionism showing through. Or is it OCD? I don't particularly know (or care).

Anyway, I've been trying to infiltrate a terrorist stronghold off the coast of Alaska, and the genetic super-soldiers within said stronghold have been causing me some bother, preventing me from posting on my blog. Or, my internet wasn't working. Which ever is more believable.

Been replaying Final Fantasy VII, hence the classic review. That game never gets old! When the prospect of spending time leveling up is actually something you look forward to, you know you've got a good RPG. Or a dangerous obsession. I've just arrived at Cosmo Canyon, for the FF fans out there, and am about to take on the dreaded caves. Shouldn't be too hard though, my characters are pretty tough. I always level up Aeris primarily, cos otherwise you can't get all her limit breaks, before the second disk (for anyone who hasn't played the game, I won't spoil why that is).

I got a guidebook for FFVII a while ago, I don't use guidebooks on the first time with games but I like having it there on the second play through, just to find all the secrets and stuff. However, I wouldn't recommend this particular book, as it has some glaring errors and sloppy mistakes, e.g. claiming that it is impossible to unlock Aeris' final limit break before disk 2, which any FAQ worth its weight in gil (gold for non-FF freaks) will show to be a falsehood. So don't get the Bradygames guide for FFVII, save some money and find one online, there are tons of good ones. The Piggyback guides for the other FF games are much better on the other hand.

That's enough FF talk for one post I think. Here's a little challenge for you. I rang my grandma this evening and had a chat with her, and she really appreciated it. I don't wanna be patronising but I think older people deserve our interest and time, and I don't think they get enough of either. I'm speaking to myself as much as to anyone else. So your task is to ring/visit/write to your grandma/grandad/grandparents/random older person you know, and if you already do those things on a regular basis, well done! Let me know how it goes.

Busy, busy, busy

Hey y'all! Sorry I haven't written anything for a little while. Been quite busy at work and with other stuff. Plus my parent's computer is sloooow at doing anything and we don't have wireless boardband, so posting an update generally involves 10 to 15 minutes for windows to load and then another 10 to 15 minutes for the anti-virus software to stop hogging all the memory and allow the internet to be barely useable. Oh well, could be worse. Could be dial-up.

Dial-up internet was amazing! Of course at the time you didn't have anything compare it with, so you were just happy to have a webpage load, even if it did take an hour. Who can forget the sound of the modem firing up? It was like artoo deetoo having a fit! And then there was the wonderful situation when someone was on the phone and you'd hear them speaking mystically from the back of your computer saying, "yeah... NNNNGHGH yeah, someone's KKKKFGG just turned the flippin' GFHHHJH internet on." Those were the days.

Anyway, steering frantically back on course, here's some stuff I've been up to instead of writing my blog. On Thursday I went back down to Portsmouth for the day to give my student house a final clean before leaving my keys. I severely underestimated how long it would take us. We were there for about 6 hours in total, but we left it spotless. The 'we' I am refering to here is my girlfriend Lauren (we're actually engaged but I always call her my girlfriend, might get in trouble for that), her grandma and myself. Now I know what you're thinking; how could I press-gang a poor elderly woman in cleaning my house? Firstly, she's fairly young and secondly, she offered to help, so... The job would have taken twice as long if she hadn't come, she is a master at cleaning, bless her. Anyway, the job is done now and I'm glad of it.

Yesterday, which was Saturday, I had a band practice with some guys from my church and my job at a certain frozen foods supermarket to take up my time. I decided to organise some music events over the summer with the help of Lauren, because there are a few people who can play well at my church, it's just a case of getting us organised. The practice went really well, considering we only played for an hour and a half, and for the first time in 3 or 4 months! Work wasn't too bad, I do the home delivery driving when they need me to, which gets me out of the shop and into the ghettos! It's not all bad though, I can listen to the tennis in the van, so every cloud...

To finish, just a small mention of the recent passing of Michael Jackson. I'll be brief because I don't have anything too valuable to add what others have already said. I hope his family can find peace at this difficult time and that we will remember him for the music and not the controversy. I wasn't the biggest fan but I still respect him as one of the greatest musicians and performers of our time.